SLiM: Bow Ties

Nowadays, people want to find cheap ways to look elegant. One such way is to get a cheap clip-on bow tie, and simply clip it on, instead of learning how to tie a real bow tie.

This is all okay if you put it under the collar. What really drives me crazy is if you clip it on over the collar.

We now present SLiM’s quick ‘n’ easy steps to put that bow tie back under the collar.

I. Unclip the bow tie.
II. Fold over collar, and close button.
III. Re-clip bow tie.
IV. Fold down collar.

If you find that you can’t follow these rules, I will quote for you from a wonderful book called Tricks of the Trade, page 180. It was written by a commentator on NBC’s Today Show named Gene Shalit, who commonly wears a bow tie.

There are two sorts of bow ties. One is real: You tie it yourself. One is false: You clip it on and apply for a job as a waiter.

In my humble opinion, a clip-on bow tie looks ridiculous, even if you are a waiter.

Here’s the bottom line: If you feel a sudden urge to put on a clip-on bow tie over your collar, I don’t want to see it unless you are writing down my order at Cuisine de ____¬ (fill it in).